When someone asks us about something that we are sure about, we assert our views and opinions. But when it comes to certain things that concern our psychology, we tend to ignore our confidence in ourselves and succumb to the factors and push ourselves to despair. 

What if we assert ourselves with the opinions and views that would enable us to pull out of the despair. The process is called self-affirmations. It is a belief rather commitment that you hold to yourself no matter what. The four cardinal rules of a self-affirmation are:

1.Set a direction rather than a goal.
2.Make it a learning direction rather than a performance direction.
3.Develop and fine tune it to make it really motivational and exciting.
4.Don’t create a fake belief, amplify something you believe already

For example, this is an affirmation statement of Justin

  Justin will: learn to glisten from the inside out, be surprised and delighted by the number and quality of Stakeholder Coaching assignments he receives, step up to the challenge of leading himself, and clients, in bringing about positive change and becoming more successful and fufilled.  He will learn to embrace the full catastrophe of life.

This is what works for Justin and only for Justin. John cannot copy this because the personality of John would be different. So create what works for you and be original and hence a winner!